Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize