At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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