operation harelip BJ is a go
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Randomize
