The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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