Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
