It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
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