There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize