Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
should my penis look like a turkey
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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