Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
