This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
