It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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