i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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