the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
