dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Too much gin, very little bucket
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Randomize