so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Randomize
