i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
