he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
