Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize
