Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
