I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize
