come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
