Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize