you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He keeps bees of course he's weird
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
