I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
