Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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