Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Randomize
