it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
The struggles of a small town man whore
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
