some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Randomize
