she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize