Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
