Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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