She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
