He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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