it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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