So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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