is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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