What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
