the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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