Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
