I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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