My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
