Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
