The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
