Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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