road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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