yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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