Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
