All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
