I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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