if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
